Astrologer, Heal Thyself

So with a spectacularly poor sense of timing I choose yesterday - the day before the Saturn station opposing natal Venus - to initiate the refinancing of the house in Silver, and after four hours sleep I was wide awake at 5 am printing out the document requirements and page upon page of forms to be filled in and faxed back in less than 36 hours.

And what do I see on Michael Lutin's Daily Fix? "The Station of Saturn - STOP AND THINK BEFORE YOU DO SOMETHING STUPID." As George S. Kaufman immortally said, in response to some poor long-winded soul attempting to sum up whatever anecdote he was trying to tell by saying "to make a long story short," - "Too late."

If I send in the application it will very probably be denied, as the underwriters want nit-picking documentation like W2s and proof of employment when I am living mostly on savings, and God only knows how many addresses will pop up for me if they do a search, what with the apartment I'm being evicted from, the hallway I've already been evicted from and now the place around the corner. Letter of Explanation, indeed.

If I don't go ahead and decide not to pursue the refinance, I forfeit the $500 I've had to put up as a deposit on the closing costs, so basically I'm screwed whatever I do, a situation I'm rapidly beginning to accept as the norm as 2012 unfolds in all its glory.

I am, of course, blameless, and can attribute the ability to make the initial phone call (which I've been thinking about doing for at least six months) on Jupiter sextile Saturn, which enabled me this past weekend to spread out every single piece of paper in my possession on the dining room table (yes! there's a dining room table here - and a table in the kitchen!), scrutinize each piece and file each away somewhere whence I may even be able to retrieve the piece when needed, assuming I can remember what each piece was filed under. Even Jupiter sextile Saturn wasn't enough to set up a cross-filing system.

And  now it's time again for *counseling,* in the course of which I shall tell counselor that really and truly I don't see anything wrong with being unhappy once in a while - if I can stop crying long enough, that is. Ha ha.